Ancient Songs and Green Magic
A Search for What Is Real in the Amazon Jungle of Peru
by David P. Crews___
I
realized that I was now in the presence of the Spirit of the vine, Mother
Ayahuasca herself.
She never spoke to me in words. Her expression was one of contained joy,
waiting to share something with me.
She widened her expressive eyes, like an inquiry, and then she showed me
something.
It
was a coin.
It is pitch black. I am shaking violently from my head to my feet. My heart is racing – pounding like a mad drummer. Hot sweat is pouring off my hair, my arms, my nose – for I am facing down, crouched on my hands and knees.
I do not know who I am. I do not know where I am. I do not know what is happening to me. I have just this moment emerged from a truly terrifying nightmare that was far more potent than anything I have ever experienced.
The only sound is my heartbeat, hammering hard, and my frantic breaths, coming too fast as I crouch in the dark. I concentrate on those breaths – trying to calm them, willing them to slow down. Just slow them down. Push the panic back. I’m regaining some control.
Wondering now, I turn my head to look up to the right and I am startled to see just the faintest dark silhouettes of human shapes, lined up in a long row fading off into the blackness. I am fearful of them.
They make no sound and do not move.
I begin to remember things, and I reach out my hand to feel the surface beneath me. It is a rough plank wood floor. I realize with some chagrin that I am, indeed, on the floor, trembling like a windblown leaf and draining sweat into a pool below my face.
Then it comes to me, a memory I ran away from so fast that it could not catch up to me until this moment. Now it quick-streams into my mind in a flash of comprehension. I am in a sacred ceremony. I have partaken of a very powerful plant medicine. It is late at night. I am in a rude hut somewhere deep in a jungle beside a dark river.
I remember. It is the Amazon Jungle. I am with others who have also partaken of this medicine and whose shapes now surround me in the darkness.
I remember who I am.
All of this has taken only a moment, and now, suddenly, a man is kneeling beside me. He is singing! I realize that he has been singing all this time, but I did not hear him until this instant when my mind focused on him. I know him. He is a shaman – the leader of this ceremony and the one who gave me the medicine.
He begins to tap my head and body with a small fan of dry leaves that make a shushing sound with each beat, and then he leans down to my neck and then my forehead and makes a sucking sound as he draws some of this energy out of me – the energy that has frightened me so much that I have instinctively leapt through the dark onto the floor of the hut in order to escape. He spits that energy away from me, into the vast darkness, and immediately I begin to regain full control of my body and my mind. I am immensely comforted by the Shaman and by his singing and his ministrations, although I am still very shaky, upset, and drenched in salty sweat.
A helping angel takes my arm now and supports me as I rise from that rough wooden floor and gingerly step back over to my seat, becoming another one of the silhouettes myself – lining up against the wall of the malluca, in the dark of night, surrounded by the chitters and cries of the night frogs and strange insects, somewhere along a fast brown river deep in the greatest and most potent forest on planet Earth.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
That scene is an accurate portrayal of the aftermath of the first, terrifying stage of my experiences, as I pursued a philosophical and spiritual dream: to work with a special medicine that the indigenous peoples of South America refer to as the Mother of all Plants, a very special and unique substance known as Ayahuasca.
My work with this spirit medicine would end, several nights later, with a remarkable encounter and an overwhelming and unanticipated flood of beauty and pure love directed towards me – a counterpoint more powerful than the true terrors of that first ceremony.
Why, though, would anyone subject themselves to such an ordeal, in such a strange and alien place? Simply, Ayahuasca presents us with a direct window into a realm or dimension that Science says does not exist. It is a place that is not on any map and it contains inhabitants that are decidedly not human beings. It is, in plain language, a powerful portal or doorway into the world of Spirit.
My first experience was alarming, but I found that if Ayahuasca takes the traveler into areas of great pain and fear, it does so in order to cleanse and to heal. There is an amazing intelligence behind it that seems to truly care for us human beings.
In a grand sense of balance, or perhaps in compensation, it also takes one into realms of incredible beauty and overwhelming joy and love, but more about that later.
This
site is
a condensed journal from my personal experiences in the Peruvian Amazon in
2006. I had traveled to the greatest forest on Earth to partake in the sacramental
use of a shamanic “Teacher Plant” – the highly psychoactive
and complex brew known as Ayahuasca, the “Vine of the
Soul.” This “tea” from a specific plant mixture has been
used for thousands of years for healing and visioning purposes by the indigenous
peoples of the Amazon basin from Brazil, to Columbia and Ecuador, and especially
in Peru.
Although extremely powerful, and notoriously difficult, unpleasant, and challenging
to work with (including a horrific taste and powerful purging), Ayahuasca
is a safe way to see incredible beauty and encounter mystical realms and spiritual
entities that are otherwise difficult for Western people to experience. For
me, it was a journey to see for myself what I might make of such realms, visions,
and entities – to try to determine What Is Real and what might be simply
illusion or masterful creativity.
Working
with Ayahuasca is an adventure of the body and spirit. For me, it was an INTENSE
set of experiences – one that challenged my physical body through difficult
diets, strong physical exertions, and often, extremely uncomfortable conditions.
___ – But that was the easy part.
It challenged my mind and spirit on levels that can only be described as
awesome and unexplainable.
We worked with a master shaman - a healer named Don Rober, and we had the excellent guidance and teaching of our host, Howard Lawler, also a shaman, who is revitalizing many of the other ancient shamanistic traditions of South America.
Shamanism is the oldest spiritual practice of humankind. The essence of shamanism is personal, direct experience and expression – not relying on anyone’s testimony or doctrines about spiritual or mystical encounters.
In
1951, Carl Jung wrote:
"In psychology, one possesses nothing unless one has experienced it in
reality. Hence, a purely intellectual insight is not enough, because one knows
only the words and not the substance of the thing from the inside."
Ayahuasca is the world’s most direct and powerful form of shamanic experience, and I had been desiring and planning to work with it for almost a decade. Now, at last, I had come to Iquitos, Peru, in the heart of the great selva or jungle. My hosts for this trip were to prove impeccable in their set and setting and in the preparation and the personnel for this great adventure of the soul.
I was picked up in Iquitos, Peru for the journey to the SpiritQuest lodge and my work with Ayahuasca. After a noisy ride in a motorcycle “rickshaw” taxi through the busy streets of the jungle city here in the heart of the Amazon, we arrived at the dock and boarded a small motor launch for the rest of the trip up the river.
We went up the Rio Nanay a bit, then turned up the Rio Momon and passed other boats and some barges made of tied logs. We docked at the retreat a few miles upriver.
Howard Lawler is our guide, mentor, translator, and facilitator for the “SpiritQuest – Listening to the Plants” spiritual retreat. Originally from the U.S. and now Peruvian, he conducts shamanic retreats with the support of his wife, Reyna, his two children, and a great staff who cook, serve, act as boat captains, and are aides during the Ayahuasca ceremonies. Howard had picked up the other participants at the airport this morning and everyone was gathered in the lodge’s dining room.
Later, we would meet Don Rober, our shaman, who is from the ancient Lamista tradition. He is 61 years old and began his shamanic studies when he was eight. He is a banco Ayahuascero, or highest quality authentic Ayahuasca shaman who’s main work is healing for the local communities and to provide guidance and shamanic leadership to select groups of interested outsiders, like ours.
Howard turned to me as I came in and said, "Hi, I'm Howard, and I have a monkey on my back." Indeed, he did! This was Rufus, the lodge's pet monkey, who's always mooching or just grabbing food and plopping from one lap to another or crawling on our backs or shoulders. Howard introduced me to the rest of the group as we were all eating a breakfast snack of fresh jungle fruits and fruit juices. A very good start to our Ayahuasca diet.
Then, we all went to check out our accomodations in a longhouse row of bungalow rooms. Not bad – a bed (actually two, but I have a room to myself), and a small toilet and sink with running water (pumped up from the river below the lodge). No electricity, of course – only kerosene lanterns at night.
We had a nice lunch of fish, beans, rice, and fruit. Much better food than I was expecting considering our dietary restrictions (No pork, sugar, salt, spices, or fermented foods, etc.). I began to get to know the 15 other group members. It is an eclectic group from many places including Australia, Canada, Switzerland, and the US. It seems to be a great group to work with and we began to bond well. Two men have brought their 16 year old daughters to work with Ayahuasca for their first time.
Afterwards, Don Rober came in with his helpers to bring in the Ayahuasca vine and Chacruna and other admixture leaves along with the cooking pots. They also set up an anvil log to hammer the caapi or Ayahuasca vine. We all helped to prepare the Ayahuasca materials by either shredding the leaves by hand or pounding the Ayahuasca vine to shreds to go in the pots. It was hard work, but very good to work with the plants that will work with us. This was also a good bonding exercise for the group.
Howard came over to talk with me for a while. He is interested in the promotion and preservation of traditional Peruvian shamanism and the authentic use of Ayahuasca.
After nightfall, dinner by kerosene lantern was next, with fish and fruit. The refrescos drinks are great: half fruit juice and half water. I had a nice long discussion with two of the other participants, then it was off to bed. The wooden walkways are lit by orange oil lamps and our rooms with kerosene lanterns. It looked like a scene from the Survivor TV show, but this camp is for real, and our challenges will be for real, as well.
Ayahuasca vine -
ready to be pounded into shreds to add to the cooking pots.
The vine contains Harmine, Harmaline, and Tetrahydroharmine.
The shamans refer to it as the "power" in the brew.
Chacruna
and Chagraponga - admixture leaves that contain the powerful vision producing
element, DMT
(NN Dimethyltryptamine).
The shamans call these plants, the "light".
the Ayahuasca "kitchen".
What is Ayahuasca?
